Background: Uuuuh, the whole book is "background".
In the beginning, God was... lonely. So He did some creative thinking and creatively thought the world into being.
Now, everyone agreed that was pretty awesome but it didn't alleviate the loneliess. So He took it one further and put together what He called "man". Everyone agreed that was even awesomer. Then? Nap time.
Duly noting that loneliness is depressing, God reworked the early model and created "woman" (...perhaps an improvement on the first draft?). If being alone was "not good," then being together was... trouble. Rule-breaking was all the rage in Eden at the time apparently and Adam and Eve (woman) were soon wearing the latest in the Spring 00000000 BC Foliage.
Chagrined and saddened, God punted them out of the garden for their own good.
(Genesis 1-3)
A&E had nothing much to do in those days which, as it often does, lead to babies.... Which lead to more babies. And more babies... and still more babies. Then some serious debauchery. More babies. More debauchery. And then, Noah.
(Genesis 4-5)
Not pleased at all with the orgiastic tendencies, God decided to reboot and restart. But before the great Ctrl+Alt+Delete, He had Noah (the "prude") build a big-ass boat to save all the animals who weren't too busy fornicating to show a little gratitude.
(Genesis 6-11)
More babies, more babies, more babies and then Abram, who God took a shine to, promising him land and more babies than you could shake a stick at. Abram and his smokin hot (but barren) wife, Sarai, traveled on with Lot, his nephew, & Co., causing a ruckus pretty much everywhere they went. Pharoah fell for Sarai, Sodom & Gomorrah were destroyed, Lot's wife turned into a pillar of salt... typical shenanigans. God eventually sat Abram down and said, "Look, I want to bless you - A LOT. Have babies. A LOT of babies."
Sarai was pretty skeptical, so she did what any logical woman would do - send her maidservant to do the birthing for her (duh). Not pleased, God clarified that, no, really, Sarai would have a baby and from the kid would many (many, many, many, many, many, many, many)more kids spring forth. And because He's God, it happened. Sarai was, I assume, pretty embarrassed.
(Genesis 12-21)
Not totally certain of Abraham (the Artist Formerly Known as Abram)'s loyalty, God tells him to sacrifice his son, Isaac, then is all "Lulz, jk jk jk jk!"; Sarah (formerly Sarai) dies; Isaac falls in love with Rebekah; and though he takes another wife, Abraham soon dies too.
(Genesis 22-25)
Following in his father's footsteps, Isaac winds up causing a lot of trouble while still managing to do quite a lot right. When he feels the stink of death creeping in, he tries to bless his son Esau but Jacob, the other son, ain't having none of that. Esau's (rightfully) pee-ohed and while he's busy shaking his fist, Jacob flees. It ain't all bad, though, as he falls hard and fast for Rachel and winds up getting Leah as a bonus second wife (score!). Par for the course, though, he tricks his father-in-law, Laban, into giving him most of his stuff. Laban's (rightfully) pee-ohed and while he's busy shaking his fist, Jacob flees.
(Genesis 26-31)
When his conscience finally catches up with him, Jacob shamefacedly returns to his brother but only after he wrestles with God, gets a new name (Israel) and lives to tell about it. Esau and Jacob reunite, weep like little girls and bury the hatchet.
Trouble doesn't end there though. Jacob's daughter gets raped and, as punishment, her brothers decide to do a little retalitory circumcision... on the entire town.
And then kill them.
(Genesis 32-34)
Isaac and Rachel die. Esau and Jacob have babies. And then they have more babies. And then their babies have babies. And then, Joseph.
There seems to be a pattern in Abraham's lineage - they all have a knack for getting into trouble. Joseph somehow manages to get his father's favor... and then get sold into slavery by his jealous brothers. And although he becomes a pretty hoity-toity servant for Pharoah, he still somehow gets himself thrown in prison for not sleeping with Pharoah's wife.
(Genesis 35-39)
But like his father's before him, Joseph finds a way to become Mr. Popularity even in jail. His reputation precedes him and it isn't long before he's schmoozing with Pharoah again and pretty much running the place.
His brothers, on the other hand, weren't doing so hot. Suffering from the famine and drought, Dad sent them to Egypt to get provisions. Joseph gets his revenge with fraudulant charges of robbery before saying, "Lulz, jk jk jk jk! It's me, the brother you shoved in a hole and then sold! No hard feelings?"
And then all become roomies until Joseph dies.
(Genesis 40-50)
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